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5 October, 16:57

What is the best way to revise the paragraph to connect

ideas?

by splitting sentence 1 into two sentences to separate

the ideas

by splitting sentence 2 into two sentences to separate

the ideas

by combining sentences 2 and 3 with the transition word

therefore

by combining sentences 4 and 5 with the transition word

SO

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Answers (1)
  1. 5 October, 17:54
    0
    This question is missing the excerpt. I've found the complete question online. It is as follows:

    Read the paragraph from a research-based essay on the benefits of a classroom with a learning center-based layout for preschoolers.

    (1) A classroom should be set up as a series of learning centers, which are designated stations that encourage exploration. (2) This layout allows children to move freely throughout the room, delving into activities that interest them and possibly discovering new materials and games. (3) Self-directed play and learning promotes confidence and independence in kids. (4) Students are focused on a task of their choosing, enjoying themselves, and interacting in smaller groups. (5) Discipline problems are often reduced.

    What is the best way to revise the paragraph to connect ideas?

    by splitting sentence 1 into two sentences to separate the ideas

    by splitting sentence 2 into two sentences to separate the ideas

    by combining sentences 2 and 3 with the transition word therefore

    by combining sentences 4 and 5 with the transition word so

    Answer:

    The best way to revise the paragraph is by combining sentences 4 and 5 with the transition word "so".

    Explanation:

    There is no need to breaking sentences 1 and 2 into two sentences with separate ideas. Both sentences are well connected, having clauses with relating ideas that can and should be connected. There is also no need to combine sentences 2 and 3 with the word "therefore". There is no connection between the ideas presented in both sentences that justifies them being combined into one.

    On the other hand, it makes perfect sense to combine sentences 4 and 5. When we read sentence 5, it sounds oddly short and lonely. When we read it right after sentence 4, we notice there is a connection between their ideas. Sentence 4 mentions students focusing on their tasks, enjoying themselves. That can lead to fewer disciplined problems, as mentioned in sentence 5. Thus, it is ok to join the sentences with "so":

    Students are focused on a task of their choosing, enjoying themselves, and interacting in smaller groups, so discipline problems are often reduced.
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