Compare the bold sections of both sentences and then answer the question that follows:

Original: My father disliked sleet, but my father disliked hail more.

Revised: My father disliked sleet, but he hated hail more.

What was done to the bolded section to improve the sentence?

A longer phrase was converted to a single word.

A modifier that did not add meaning was removed.

Redundant phrases were eliminated.

Repetitive words were replaced with synonyms and pronouns.

Question

English

Paisley Stein

9 November, 05:24

Compare the bold sections of both sentences and then answer the question that follows:

Original: My father disliked sleet, but my father disliked hail more.

Revised: My father disliked sleet, but he hated hail more.

What was done to the bolded section to improve the sentence?

A longer phrase was converted to a single word.

A modifier that did not add meaning was removed.

Redundant phrases were eliminated.

Repetitive words were replaced with synonyms and pronouns.

+3

Answers (1)

Know the Answer?

Carl Morrow · Answer 1

To improve the sentence indicated above, the bolded section was changed in this way:

Repetitive words were replaced with synonyms and pronouns.

The sentence becomes better because redundant words were eliminated yet the thought was still preserved concisely and precisely.